BOOK LIST No. 1: MARRIAGE & RELATIONSHIPS

[booktalker]

I'm in the middle of reading Hannah Shah's "The Imam's Daughter" - very harrowing. She has a website and offers help to girls/women going through similar issues (abuse, forced marriage etc.). There is also a links page - maybe you could suggest a link to MT on it?!

http://www.hannahshah.com/helpful-links/

B

[saffron]

Yes..I usually look at the internet after reading a book to see what comes up..I noticed this information..its a help for those who suffered sexual abuse in particular.

Booktalker..would you like to sugest a link to Hannahs links page? That would be great!

[saffron]

I just wanted to say..that I am half way through Bobby's book..its written really well ..I admire the honesty and the openess that I believe will help lots of us on here. I just want to be best friends with them both! What an amazing couple!

Will come back on some of the areas raised if thats ok Bobby and margaret...may be useful to see how these things affect us all ...

Saffronx

[Bobby Smith]

What lovely comments - we are so glad you like it. We figured it was best to be honest when we wrote it, even if it does make the reader squirm!! Mind you, you are about to enter the more 'difficult' second half of the book.
We like to think we we are friends with everyone who reads our book!

[saffron]

  Thank Bobby! 

I ve read the parenting chapter...if only you knew how similar these issues are for us..any parent for that matter!  For what its worth Ive said very little, when I do, Im very calm....but nothing changes! Ive accepted that people are all different, and actually most children/adults... human beings sort themselves out as they grow...Im having to come to terms with my daughter leaving home for uni,and have brought her up to be independant ..the thing is Im happy for her to go as I see this as the next stage of her life...and learning...but Im terrified that she will have so much to deal with, and will face all those things like loneliness and heartache! for one... My point is that all parents must face this...and I dont want to!!But know I will have to and be there 100% ...even though I know we could be taken for a ride sometimes........

[Bobby Smith]

I guess that is the pleasure/pain of parenthood - that no one understands that we all go through it. I think your daughter will be fine - leaving home is the best way for a person to mature - which is why I still wear my punk rock clothes!!!!!!

[saffron]

 

 Is that what will happen? She will discover wearing punk rock clothes? I'll have to remember that this is what happens when you go to uni...so I wont be so shocked when it does happen.



 ... Shes studying music by the way Bobby..so it could happen...she'll be writing 'Theme and Variation in punk rock music' what do you think?

[Bobby Smith]

Theme and variation!!!  No way - three chord magic is all you need. I am an expert on German punk so if she needs some music tips let me know. Mind you, after reading our Hobbies chapter, you too will soon be an expert!!!!!!   

[saffron]

Ahh..remebered 2 more books I read some years ago which are excellant...

1. In My Own Name....by Sharanjeet Shaan.

This is a true story of a sikh girl who went to medical school at 18 and met a muslim student whom she fell in love with. Her family discovered the relationship and locked her away in a room in the courtyard of their home...for over 3 months, only passing food to her,isolating her.

She concedes to an arranged marriage as the only way out to a man in Britain, he drinks heavily and she struggles with this complex relationship raising her boys in a very difficult situation.

She meets with her long lost boyfrined many yeas later, who had trained as a doctor and moved to scotland I think, by chance. He did not  know what had happened to her. She takes her surname from him...'Shaan'

I met Sharanjeet when I first married in 1987, she is now in Africa I believe supporting an education project. She was involved in talks and raising awareness of domestic violence in the 1980's..in England.

[saffron]

I kind of guessed theme and Variation wasn't possible... somehow...

I will have to listen to this music now ,as I dont think I ever have done seriously before.

Ill let her know about experts in the field of German Punk ...

[saffron]

 Another book...

'Life is not all Ha Ha Hee Hee'

...By Meera Syal...( yes ....The Meera Syal from Goodness Gracious me)



Set in Birmingham...the 'black country'...interesting account of an asian girls view of growing up in the midlands...set in the 60's early 70's?  Sense of humour througout...

There was a run up to this book by the same author...Cant remember the title at the moment...

Ahh I think it was Called ' Anita and Me' By Meera Syal

[booktalker]

And I've just finished The Imam's Daughter - it's brilliant. Hannah Shah turned her life right round in the most positive way and now helps others. I'm looking forward to reading Bobby and Margaret's book, although it's only very slowly working its way to the top of a huge pile!

B

[booktalker]

Talking about children, my favourite quotation is:

"There are only two lasting bequests we can give our children. One is roots, the other is wings."

(William Hodding Carter)

[chweetgurl]

Saffron i watched 'goodness gracious me'  on dvd it was really funny...
currently reading 'a black englishman' by carolyn slaughter a story between british married woman & a doc
it takes back to the colonlised India under British rule..half way through after which i plan to read bobby & margaret's book recomended by saffron
 

[Bobby Smith]

Thank you Chweetgurl and Booktalker - we hope you like it. If it is any consolation, Booktalker, I currently have a pile of 16 books to read!!!